My Birthday’s Coming Up Soon (hint, hint)

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About J@m3z Aitch

J@m3z Aitch is a two-bit college professor who'd rather be canoeing.
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7 Responses to My Birthday’s Coming Up Soon (hint, hint)

  1. Scott Hanley says:

    I didn’t get my Dallara chassis for Christmas, so, no.

  2. Lance says:

    James Hanley,

    Are you going to wear it while binge drinking during your Superbowl party to prevent a William Holden style exit? It would certainly cause projectile vomiting from your guests with taste.

    Scott Hanley,

    Why would you want an irrelevant chassis from an irrelevant racing series?

    I have lived in Indy for over thirty years. The 500 is dead. It’s been dead for years. Tony George killed it. Nearly identical emasculated and archaic machines designed to struggle around in NASCAR-like bunches, owned by millionaires, driven by candy ass prima donnas.

    Now they’re gonna be 2.2 liter V-6’s? Seriously? What’s next, Nissan Leafs?

    If I had the dough I would buy 600 acres outside of Danville Indiana and build a wider, longer road course track. I would have a race in June (better weather than fickle May in Indiana) and hold open qualifications for any thing with four wheels, under four thousand pounds, wheel driven, less than 20 feet in length, 6 feet wide and three feet tall.

    If you die driving it; not my problem. If you kill other drivers while dying; not my problem.

    As Super Chicken said to his faithful side kick Fred “You new the job was dangerous when you took it.”

    Want to be 100% safe while racing? Get a Game Cube.

    And by the way, I’d be proud to be among the first field of drivers. I’m not planning on living forever and checking out behind the wheel of a race car would be as good a way to go as any.

    Racing is living on the ragged edge (or at least it used to be). That’s why the men (yes they were all men then) that are legends became legends. If you aren’t willing to risk your life to win what are you risking and why should I give a shit?

  3. James Hanley says:

    If I had the dough…

    If you had that kind of dough you could buy me a whole football team’s worth of these helmets with your petty cash.

  4. Lance says:

    If I had the dough…

    I would build a stadium in the infield of my mega-track and fund the formation of an IUPUI football program.

    But I’d insist that they ditch the silly Jaguar mascot and return to their original team name.

    Do you recall that name?

  5. James Hanley says:

    Hell, I didn’t even know they were called the Jaguars.

    What do you call the mascot of a school whose name is pronounced ooey-pooey?

  6. Lance says:

    Well, they used to be called the Metros. I guess because it is a downtown campus.

    I would call them the Palindromes.

  7. James Hanley says:

    I would call them the Palindromes.

    That would be classic.

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